Okay this will be long, but I have a lot to say about this book….
Let’s all take a moment.
Take a deep breath.
4 counts in. Hold it it. 4 counts out.
You good?
Okay…
Mayte Garcia is probably one of the most polarizing figures in the P universe.
We knew she was his first wife. Mother of his kids. They shared several tragedies. She was on a reality show. Things happened.
Not a ton of info about their time together other than what was heard on the grapevine…and OH what a grapevine it has been.
So informed by said grapevine, I came to this book full of side eye, salt, and envy if I can be completely honest here. Lump on the features in People magazine, I came with WHY?! Reading that absolutely tuned my stomach and I felt horrible for wanting to know such personal things.
But then I realized, I was reading this in People magazine, which isn’t the most credible source for information as they tend to be sensational most of time.
So I said to myself, I’ve read dozens upon dozens of Prince books and articles from former band mates, scholars, super fans, journalists, groupies, ex-girlfriends…why not read one by his first wife.
Also, if I want to speak about this book with any credibility, I have to read it.
And so I did.
Can I tell you that I had to eat every single judgmental thought I’ve ever had about her?
Can I tell you that she addresses pretty much every “why” question I had regarding her?
Can I tell you about the amount of self-awareness this woman has and perhaps even had during her time with Prince?
Can I tell you how surprised I was about how well written this book is? About how good of a story teller she is? About how my respect for her just as a woman skyrocketed?
Can I tell you how ashamed I was for being surprised about how well written this book is? About how good of a story teller she is? About how my respect for her just as a woman only skyrocketed after having read this?
Can I tell you that even at the sweetest moments with her and P, I did not have an IOTA of envy and was excited and happy that they were so in love?
Can I tell you how important context is when considering what people do and why they do it?
This book is about Mayte Garcia.
It’s about HER life and when Prince enters it, it’s still about HER life. When he exits…still about HER life.
I feel like I grew as a person by reading this, learning not to judge, and to look at myself and really consider the reasons why I react or get upset about things regarding P, or really just in general. I learned to address those things so I can be free to just absorb and appreciate other people’s life experience without placing my own projections onto it.
Not gonna lie, this is a VERY difficult book to read, especially leading up to the anniversary, not because of what’s in it (the info about Prince and his habits isn’t new if you’ve read Dance, Music, Sex, Romance by Per Nilsen or Possessed by Alex Hahn) but because of the emotionally raw place it comes from.
Everyone will stand in front of a huge mirror when it comes to this book. What you see in it will be very revealing of who you are as a person.
If you’re coming to it with an anti-mayte agenda and a point to prove, you will find evidence here that will corroborate what you think about her…because that is what you will want to find…and that is all that you will see.
If you’re coming with a set idea that Prince is a wonderful, loving, sexy and giving musical genius, you may be in for a disruptive experience that will humanize him in more ways you’re ready for (ESPECIALLY if you haven’t read the aforementioned books).
If you come with a general curiosity about him with no context about him otherwise, you will find it to be a depiction of a flawed genius…and maybe a few other not so nice judgements without having the context of his upbringing.
If you come with a critical, but open minded place of love4oneanother and really lean into this, really dig in and challenge yourself, your perceptions, your prejudices, your bias, you will find this book to be an incredibly DIFFICULT, but humbling and cathartic experience.
I thoroughly enjoyed this deeply resonating and evocative journey. I came with a critical, but open minded mindset, had to reset my own feelings every few pages…then found that I didn’t have to anymore as I progressed through the book. I emerged with HUGE amounts of respect for Mayte, and yes Prince was humanized even more in a MAJOR way through her lens, even given that much the info here isn’t new if you’ve been around.
It’s interesting in that he is in this book for sure, but this book is not about him at all. You still only get a glimpse of who he was. I found I still very much loved and wanted to protect the complex and human man that was depicted here (as much as you can a stranger). He is still a wonderful, loving, sexy, giving musical genius. Even at the most difficult points when he seemed to be only one of those things (lol), he was still transparent, pure of intent, and INCREDIBLY consistent in the way he dealt with really everything. He’s still my Professor…now more than ever…and in more ways than I ever thought he could be…
Whatever your perception of this book is, in reading it, you will be challenged deeply on the reasons why you are fam and you will have to face that truth in a VERY direct way. It will take some time to process and you should let this marinate for a minute while you do. Don’t be afraid of what might come up as you work it out. Let it wash over you and really do some self inventory…if you do this right, it can really be an amazingly healing ride. That was my experience and I hope you are able to free yourself so you can learn, grow, and heal from this journey as well.